


And It All Falls Down

by SeoulWings13



Series: LiT - D.Min/Dongho Centric [2]
Category: Lost in Translation (Webcomic)
Genre: Abandonment, Betrayal, Cake, Disability, Drowning, Dystopia, Forced, Future, Gen, Guilt, Haphephobia, Lab rat, Mental Health Issues, No Romance, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Overdose, Perfect, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Schizophrenia, Self-Esteem Issues, Social Anxiety, Suicide, Technology, Test subject, The Author Regrets Nothing, Torture, Trauma, abused dongho, different from them, dont do drugs, elitest, imprisoned, no, rey explain yourself, rey why did you write this, unable to understand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 03:35:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28646892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeoulWings13/pseuds/SeoulWings13
Summary: Shinings lived as the rulers of a perfect world. Dongho isn't perfect. He was mute and tainted. There was nothing special to come from his relationship. Ven also was 'disabled' but he had worked the system and lived a life as a self-preserving Shining with no loyalty.
Relationships: Ahn Jaewon | Wyld & Kim Daehyun, Ahn Jaewon | Wyld & Kim Taeseok, Ahn Jaewon | Wyld & Lee Minsoo, Ahn Jaewon | Wyld/Kang Dongho | D.Min/Kim Daehyun/Lee Minsoo, Ahn Jaewon | Wyld/Kim Daehyun/Lee Minsoo, Ahn Jaewon | Wyld/Lee Minsung, Im Youngjoon | Young J & Jung Hyunjin | Ven & Kim Taeseok & Lee Minsung & Moon Kyunghun, Im Youngjoon | Young J & Kim Daehyun, Im Youngjoon | Young J/Lee Minsung/Moon Kyunghun, Im Youngjoon | Young J/Moon Kyunghun, Jung Hyunjin | Ven & Kang Dongho | D.Min, Kang Dongho | D.Min/Kim Daehyun/Lee Minsoo, Kang Dongho | D.Min/Lee Minsung, Lee Minsoo & Lee Minsung
Series: LiT - D.Min/Dongho Centric [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2167359
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	1. Perfection is Far From It

**Author's Note:**

> Whee! Roller-Coaster time

**"Perfection is far from it"**

**\--------------------------------------------**

It had been a day or maybe a year. Every day they were hunting him. There was no respite from the running. He had done anything wrong, but he was mute, unable to defend himself. The world was built to be perfect and he wasn't. Dongho ran faster tripping over tree roots. The only sound was his beating heart and thudding footsteps. He was young, younger than most of the people chasing him, but he was so fearful. Tears traced rivers down Dongho's cheeks, the only clean spots on his face from the watery tracks. He paused. Air. Air. He needed air. It was the quickest of sharp breaths, but it was oxygen.

He was running again, feet entangled in leaves and vines. All this running and he couldn't call for help. He had everything they wanted. Tall, beautiful, the perfect makings of a Shining, but he was flawed. The Shinings terrified Dongho. They were rumored to be greater than human, their superiority used to control the weaker and less perfect of beings. Dongho didn't want any part of it. It wasn't that he was born this way, in fact, he was born ready to be a Shining. When he was five, there was an accident. He had fallen and cried. His father had been angry. There had been a sharp pain. And then Dongho could no longer speak. He had been cast out, running non-stop.

That was roughly twelve years ago. He was a refuge surviving off of scraps and what he could steal. Posters calling for his arrest littered the walls. He would've turned himself in if the stories of prison life hadn't haunted his ears. They wanted to catch him and use him. He'd go where the failed Shinings went. _The_ _Camp._ It was a correction camp. Even if they were too flawed to be a Shining, they could still be a Crystal. Crystals were looked down upon and esteemed at the same time. Children who were good, but not good enough. They were an acceptable position in society, but were often gossiped about and harassed.

Dongho vowed to never become one of them. His best friend Jaewon had been forced into that life. As far as Dongho knew, three Shinings had a Crystal. Jaewon was among them, as was a boy who lived down the street from him; Daehyun. Minsoo was the third, however, his name was unfamiliar to Dongho. All Dongho could do was a vow to never become one of them. He needn't worry. The people just wanted to capture him and use him for something else. Cobwebbed thoughts had slowed his pace. Dongho kept running. He ran harder and faster than before. Was the mob still after him? Had they calmed down? He listened for a while. They weren't coming anymore?

Dongho sat down, his aching body crying for some sort or break. His eyelids drooped. Hungry and completely defeated, he drifted off to sleep. There was nothing more he could do. A lack of food, his body needed sleep as compensation. The dark-haired boy sleeping by the brook was an interesting sight. He was angelic looking and almost normal looking. A passerby would assume he was camping, not running for his life. No one on their walk would think he was the most wanted criminal. Dongho didn't even remember his offenses. He'd done a bunch of things to upset the Shinings and the government.

Maybe it was the time he had helped the lower sector get food from the guards. They were being stingy, he couldn't help it. Maybe it was the other time he had stolen a trunk of furs. He was cold, and the children living in the mid-sector were cold. Again, he couldn't help it. Dongho was unapologetic about taking from the richer and more fortunate to help those struggling. His society was so advanced yet primitive at the same time. Offense after offense stacked up against the mute boy who didn't care about anything but keeping his freedom. Dongho had seen what they did to rebels and heard tales of their prisons. He didn't intend to be clipped from life like that. Who gave them the power anyway?

Hours passed before Dongho awoke. The moon was shining brightly, illuminating a path. He started to move again, climbing up a small hill. The more height he had, the better. The dazzling lights of the city hit his eyes. It was too perfect, not a color out of place, not a light out of sync. It was, however, undeniably beautiful. Pinks and blues painted the skyline in neon colors, accented by yellows and greens of the lower units. Furthest from the heart of the capital city, the smaller buildings glittered a bright hue of cyan, satsuma, and crimson. The city was the richest in the middle. Often the outer edges weren't as fortunate, and so Dongho helped where he could. A hand touched Dongho's shoulder and the seventeen-year-old whipped around, panic filling his steady breathing.

His only friend, another misfit, Jung Hyunjin waved. Hyunjin was the definition of androgynous beauty. There were a masculine feminity and feminine masculinity surrounding him. Small hands, well-toned body, pretty face, dyed green and red hair, he was made to be a Shining. He held their angelic beauty. Except, Hyunjin was deaf. A flaw amongst the beauty of his face. He'd been born that way to a rich family. When they found out, he had run. Ven, as he preferred to be called, was currently taking his familiar spot by Dongho. The fifteen-year-old was reserved, words spoken with his hands. He'd taught Dongho sign language, both of them able to converse freely.

Ven's shoulders were drawn tightly together. He was nervous about something. Dongho watched as his shoulders refused to relax before setting a palm against their back. Ven looked at him, worry etched in every line of his young face. Dongho couldn't help but feel his heart twist in sympathy. Nothing the two of them could do would prevent the upcoming events. It's twisted how a simple game could be changed into something so dark, and how a simple invention could hurt so many people. The invention was more science, but Dongho lumped it into the same category. It was all the same to him anyway.

The event in question was entitled "Mayhem." It was a fitting name for the organized chaos that would break out. The new technology would be updated and everyone would scrabble for the latest version of whatever. Their greed made Ven sick. Dongho didn't understand it fully, but Ven's money had apparently bought every version of anything, even if he didn't care or need it. Now, it was a source of shame to the younger boy. Dongho often wondered what happened when Ven was cast out or if he left. Dongho had been five.

He wasn't supposed to survive. To this day Dongho didn't know how he did. Granted, he didn't remember anything until he was roughly eleven. What a sad coincidence it was eleven he had clear memories of. The normal children would take the placement test at eleven. The test would determine their future. Dongho knew Ven wanted to take it. Ven was a natural bright student, and just the desire to see where he'd place was an immense source of curiosity for him. An odd fact struck him. He hadn't met Ven until last year, the deaf younger being mysterious about his past. Dongho could respect privacy, but he was curious. Oh, so curious. The skyline twinkled, and though he was still thinking a mile a minute, he refrained from initiating a conversation with Ven.

Eventually, the two stood up and turned to find a spot to sleep for the night. Dongho wasn't tired though. His nap was still fueling his body. As he kept an eye on the area, more questions punctuated his thoughts. He shook his head, trying to ward them off, but they wouldn't leave. They were multiplying at an alarming rate. Why was he so curious about Ven? They two were friends. Dongho trusted him. He trusted Dongho. These intrusive questions would break the unspoken agreement they had. He was just thinking too much. Dongho inhaled deeply. Air his lungs were previously starved for, moved throughout his body. The muscles expanded and contracted under his skin, drawing forth a peaceful state of mind.

He sorted his thoughts as he breathed. Ven would disappear and they'd meet at their designated hiding spot after the sunset on the last day of Mayhem. The multi-day event was a source of potential food and Dongho was hungry. The moon lowered and the sun began to rise. Ven began to stir beside Dongho and awoke quietly. The older looked down on the younger, placing a hand on his head. The two sat in a comfortable silence watching the scenery. When the sun fully rose, Ven got up and dashed downhill.

-

Dongho had been unusually quiet, and that worried Ven. Not that it was supposed to. Ven wasn't supposed to worry about anyone else. He was eventually going to turn the older in, it wasn't anything personal, but the money was too good to resist. It's fairly easy to pretend his deafness didn't exist. Lip reading and everything was easy. Besides, his spot at the top was waiting. The other Shinings were worried about him. Why? _Simply because Hyunjin was one of them._ He held a spot at the top.

He made his way to his room in the capitol building. Dongho would be so betrayed, but business was business. He intended to wait out Mayhem because it really did disgust him, but he intended to wait it out with a decent meal and bath. Minsung greeted him at the door and Ven gave a small smile. He rarely talked, but it was taken as a personality choice because _they had heard him speak_. Ven had practiced vocal inflections even though he had found sign language easier. Not one of them knew he wasn't "perfect."

A bath was drawn, fragrant flowers decorating the water's smooth surface. As Ven relaxed, the dirt being washed from his body. Today he'd feast and be merry while Dongho scrounged for scraps. It wouldn't be long before Ven was ready to turn him in. Seventeen was a prime age for those below, after all. There was no guilt in the younger. He felt Dongho should be controlled, used, and be a benefit to society. There was no use to let him run around as a low life in the area beyond the city. His bath finished, Ven pulled on an adaptive suit. It was a pastel green, and when he turned it on, holographic screens and the digital world came alive.

He checked his socials, responding to emails and fans. There were so many people throwing themselves at him, begging to be his Crystal. He had no want for one. Kyunghun didn't either. Little minions coming at their every beck and call were too much work. Ven didn't want to take care of another, regardless of the circumstances. Ven reclined on his bed, ordered some food, and smiled. He was just resting right now. Plans to take Dongho in would be executed seamlessly. All Ven had to do was wait out the very long week.

-

Dongho had scored himself a corndog. It was slightly burned, therefore unsellable, and had been thrown out. His stomach sighed in relief when the food was deposited. It was heavenly. There was nothing better than the flavor of salty meat and muted corn cake. Dongho smiled before remembering Ven. He hoped the boy had enough to eat. Ven was too slim for Dongho's liking, but every time he tried to give the boy food, it was denied with a smile. Ven wanted Dongho to keep up his own strength. He was so caring.

The week dragged on, Dongho eating well here and there. He enjoyed a wide range of different foods, including a piece of cake. It was soft and fluffy, covered in a sweet cream frosting. Dongho didn't know what was wrong with it, minus the fact it had a little bit of a salty taste. He was to meet Ven later, and he stored a little bit for later. Maybe they'd be able to share a sweet treat together. He moved through the crowds quickly, the Shingings were going to speak soon. Dongho didn't want to hear them spout propaganda. Two of them didn't have a Crystal, and recruitments were going on.

If Dongho had stayed a little longer, he'd have seen the five beautiful boys that made up the Shinings. He would've seen the three Crystals kneeling like dogs by their Shining's feet. He would've seen a bored Ven in an outfit worth enough to feed an entire lower sector. Dongho didn't see it. He didn't hear Minsung, Taeseok, Kyunghun, Young J, and Ven speaking to the crowd, congratulating them on their purchases. He didn't fail to see the bounty on his head increase. They were desperate to capture him. Eliminate the threat to their perfect society. He was dangerous even as he was voiceless. 

Ven showed up a little later. Dongho offered the younger a bit of the cake, and to his surprise, he wasn't turned down. Ven delicately licked his fingers after eating his portion. Inwardly he shuddered. The cake was _salty_. Dongho's earnest face was smiling at him, and for the first time, guilt shot through Ven. This was the most wanted criminal? This was the boy who supposedly killed guards? This boy who vowed to never hurt anyone unless absolutely necessary was a violent criminal? The media screwed things over, they always did, but how badly had they messed up this story?

Dongho was signing to Ven. He was making sure the younger was eating well. Another shot of guilt raced through him. A roast chicken and cup of sparkling cider had made up his lunch, that he didn't even bother to finish. Dongho was excited over a piece of ruined cake. Ven made something up about finding a piece of fried chicken too crisp for sale. He had been watching Minsung toy with his Crystal, Minsoo. Ven's life was boring. He was incredibly privileged and his life so lavish. Yet this, this life with Dongho felt so much more freeing. It was simple and hard, but he was himself. 

He never considered himself disabled. Maybe Dongho did since he wasn't born mute, but Ven never had a problem. It was one of the reasons he was a Shining in the first place. Hearing tests were easy. Vibrations alerted him during hearing exams, lip readings during the interviews. He still spoke; recording technology advanced enough to tell him where his inflections were lacking. Though his use of many different devices was unconventional, it worked. He landed himself a top spot as one of the youngest Shinings. He had been going for a walk when he had met Dongho. A plan had begun to form. Earn his trust and turn him in. For a year, he had been doing just that. 

Now his goal was nearing, and Ven was having doubts for the first time. He had seen Dongho help the lower sectors, and if he was turned in, correction camp would certainly change him. Then, maybe Ven would stand up and take him as his Crystal. As if. Ven didn't even care to take a perfectly fine person under him. He'd seen how Minsoo, Daehyun, and Jaewon acted though. The three of them were living in constant fear of their Shining. Minsoo and Minsung were supposed to be brothers, but Minsoo didn't act like they were. Ven had seen the cowardice and meekness to which Daehyun served Youngjoon. He had scoffed at Jaewon moving at every beck and call of Taeseok. Dongho wouldn't break to that level. Would he?

Dongho was tapping his arm. Ven was shaken out of his thoughts. There was nothing he could do to turn back. It would be incredibly foolish to back out now. Besides, Minsung would be proud of him. He'd be a hero to everyone. Maybe not to Dongho, but the boy should've thought twice before distributing food to the ones undeserving of it. The rations were there for a reason. The lower sectors were too poor to afford anything more. It would be quick. Dongho didn't even have to know it was his friend who betrayed him. Ven would fade into the background, maybe have some fun. 

The older male was gesturing he wanted to sleep and was asking Ven to keep watch. The younger forced a smile and agreed. When Dongho woke up, he'd no longer be a free boy. A shudder ran through Ven. His money was going to come in pools, and Dongho would be out of the picture. No more dirt on his face or itchy clothing. No more cake that was a touch too salty. He'd live the life he was meant to. Ven tutted softly. If only Dongho hadn't run, he'd had a chance at a decent life. Even a street urchin was better than what he was currently. 

-

It was carefully orchestrated. Shackles were clipped onto Dongho's ankles and wrists. A thick chain wrapped around the tall male's entire body restricting movement. He called the authorities to come to collect the criminal. The other Shinings appeared to congratulate Ven. He still felt guilty that Dongho had trusted and worried about him, but it was a matter of the past. He had cash flowing into his account like water. Dongho was injected with some sort of tracker and taken away, still asleep.

Poor sweet Dongho who happened to trust the wrong person.


	2. Piteous Thing, Hideous Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When everyone's mask breaks bit by bit, there's no way to stop it-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whee, another monster of a chapter. I was hoping to do this in three, but there is no possible way.

**"What a piteous thing, a hideous thing**

**Was tainted by the rest** **"**

**\--------------------------------------------**

Dongho awoke to darkness. It was impossible to see anything. He tried to hold out his palm before finding his limbs were restrained with heavy chains. More sense came and he found himself on his knees. Cold metal kissed his skin with harsh lips, chain links connecting him to a wall. A set of chains around his wrists and ankles pulled him backward while a second set connecting to his forearms and thighs pulled him forward. A heavy-set collar with four links pulled him downward. They seemed to connect to the ground. 

Footsteps. A hand yanked off the thick blindfold covering Dongho's eyes and the dim light took a moment to get used to. He was indeed chained, there being more restraints than he had formerly realized. The collar was indeed connected to the ground. He seemed to be kneeling on a raised platform in the middle of a room with no way of moving. Focusing on the person who entered the room, Dongho's heart fell. It was Jaewon. The boy was trembling as he bustled around tightening restraints here and there. Without another word, the young Crystal fled from the room, his job done.

If Dongho could scream, he would've. If he could've sworn, he would've. Yet, despite all his desire to speak, he couldn't. A lack of a tongue and a severely damaged vocal box made sure of that. He could still cry, but he restrained himself. There was no honor in shedding tears on the hard surface. His knees throbbed and his chest heaved. There was nothing he could do but hope. He hoped Ven wasn't captured as well, he hoped they wouldn't try to correct him. He had no defense to the words they would throw at him. Damage decorated his legacy like medals on a military uniform. 

His chest lit up with several green dots. That only meant one thing. Important people were coming and if he _said_ anything offensive, he'd be shot dead. If he could say anything. Five noticeable boys filed inside through the metal doors. Chairs were provided by the three Crystals. Dongho was kneeling in front of the Shinings. He looked at each of them carefully. Pink and Blue hair, Dark Blue, Ruddy Brown, Pinkish Purple, Green with Red tips. Dongho froze as his eyes fell on the familiar face of Ven. Dongho would've screamed right there. Ven wasn't perfect. He was deaf. He couldn't hear. And yet as the five of them introduced themselves, Ven spoke perfectly. He responded flawlessly. Was his deafness a lie? Had Ven betrayed him?

"I'm Minsung." A quiet lilting voice came from the pink and blue haired male. Dongho couldn't help but notice everything about him was perfect. His posture and everything. "Why don't you tell us about yourself?"

Dongho didn't even try and respond. 

Ruddy brown hair spoke. "Minsung, this is the mute one. We gotta baby him." the words were said with a hint of contempt, but Dongho couldn't help be mesmerized by the other male. He was showing almost no skin; long gloves covered his arms and knee-high boots clad his feet. Angel-like.

Pink haired smiled. "Kyunghun's right. Nod for yes, shake your head for no. Got it?"

Dongho nodded. The chains around his neck clinked softly.

"Are you Kang Dongho?"

Nod.

"Were you responsible for the theft of two-hundred packets of rations?"

Ah. The lower regions were starving. Dongho had distributed a truck of food to them. He nodded. 

"Were you the one who stole a trunk of furs in the southern unit?"

Nod.

Past offenses were listed, some Dongho shook his head too. He hadn't _hurt_ anyone despite the rumors. His captors, however, looked disappointed in him. Maybe it was his imagination, but every chain seemed to tighten when he denied one of their claims. 

"Are you okay with the fact you're a wanted criminal?"

A shake of the head. He hated being hunted, chained, constricted. Besides the real criminal was sitting among them, filing his nails.

Ven spoke, his voice quiet and smooth. "Do you think you deserve what we're going to do to you?"

A shake.

"But you understand why we have too right?"

A reluctant nod.

Pink hair spoke again. "If you cooperate, maybe it won't be as bad."

They made it sound so menacing. Dongho was scared. He didn't want to be punished for being unnatural, but here he was. It wasn't his fault. Right? It wasn't his fault. Please, he never asked to be mute. His neck was being squeezed by the collar. It was definitely shrinking, the metal becoming a second skin. Dongho swallowed, finding even that, was difficult. 

"Taeseok, don't lie to him." That would mean the dark blue hair was Youngjoon. Dongho focused on the silent Shining. He was currently staring at his Crystal. Daehyun looked so old and tired under the weight of his work. He was constantly doing things for his Shining, fetching a drink, or sitting under the weight of Youngjoon's fingers. 

"Dongho." Minsung snapped his fingers. "Sleep well tonight. It'll be the last time you get some, consistently."

He nodded and watched the boys exit. The light turned off, plunging Dongho into darkness. His mind drifted to his childhood. For whatever reason, he was remembering things he hadn't been able to recall before. 

-

A scroll of memories was unfurling in his mind. His mother- her eyes looked funny. They were milky white, no pupils. She hadn't been able to see after she had gotten sick. No one was supposed to know she had been sick, but when she opened her eyes one day and didn't register her son, she had been disposed of. Dongho had forgotten how. There was a big ceremony in the square. He remembered that much of her. He remembered crying when his father couldn't hear. Every detail of her face was coming back to him. Her long dark hair clipped back with silver pins, the way her hands moved when she was painting. That's right, she used to paint the most beautiful pictures.

It frustrated Dongho. He had been barely five, and all the small details were fleeing again. His mind flitted to more recent events. He had fallen badly. He had cried. His father whose mental state was deteriorating at the loss of his wife had gotten upset. He had a knife. There were pain and blood, and Dongho found himself unable to make a sound. If his arms weren't so harshly pulled behind him, Dongho would've touched his throat. He was sure a scar would meet his fingertips. A lack of mirrors and he had forgotten small details of his appearance. 

Red had stained the white of their home. Red stained everything. Dongho had never hated a color so much. Red turned to a crusty brown, and the young boy of five had sat, tears streaming from his eyes. Cuffs encased his father's hands. The knife had been disposed of. A white bandage had been pressed to Dongho's throat, but the boy couldn't make a sound. Talk of being a Crystal scared him. He didn't want to be under anybody. So he ran. He ran into the woods and around the numerous trees. 

His friends were the little animals left in urban society. Birds chirped and wolves howled. Dongho began stealing food here and there. He would eat well every Mayhem. Every time he needed something, he'd play Robin Hood with the goods. The lower units functioned better with the extra help, not that they'd admit it. Pride was a defining trait of the society he was forced to live in. 

He must've drifted off to sleep because Dongho found himself dreaming. His dream was in red, white, and black. It was him and Ven, Ven goofing off, Ven being himself. There was Ven laughing and Ven crying. There was Ven enjoying the cake and Ven resting his head on Dongho's shoulder. That wasn't faked. A filter slid over and Dongho saw the lip curl in disgust, the scoff, the too clean face. Ven hadn't been honest with him, but Dongho was sure of one thing. Ven wasn't lying about being deaf. Somehow, he'd found a way to work the system and get a good life out of it. It didn't make Dongho happier about being chained and restricted, but it made sense. He'd do the same thing in Ven's shoes.

The dream shifted. He was soaring through the sky, ebonite wings flapping. His mom was flying next to him, her face full of smile lines. She took his hand and guided him back into the stale room. Somehow it made Dongho feel heavier. He was trapped, but trapped with the ability to fly through the skies. Finally, he understood the sadness a caged bird went through. He was so upset, being unable to soar in the skies. 

-

Ven splashed more water on his face. 3 am and the voices were louder. They'd always been there, but now they were screaming. He felt so violated, so guilty, so unable to think. Ven had chosen to turn his friend in. He shuddered. Was he even worthy to call Dongho a friend? He'd been himself around him, but he'd stabbed him in the back. Security feeds showed Dongho in the same position. He was sleeping, almost peacefully. There was going to be no respite later though. He'd be forced to conform to society or be executed. A small laugh escaped Ven's lips. Dongho wasn't the first, nor was he the last to be imperfect. 

They all had problems, Ven knew that. Shinings were just good at hiding them. To this day, Ven couldn't figure out what was wrong with the others. It just had to be there. No one could be so perfect all the time. Ven probably had more problems than most of them. Besides the voices and incredible guilt eating him away, he wasn't eating anymore. At first, he'd blamed stress, but as days went on, he just couldn't keep food down. He'd eat and it'd come back up. All this talk about wanting to be a Shining and loving this life was it really worth Dongho's suffering?

There was something about the way Dongho had looked so defeated from the start, how his eyes had fixed on Ven's face, and the quiet acceptance his best friend had betrayed him. Dongho didn't even commit any serious crime. They were just mad he'd been running around for so long. His misdeeds were hyperbolized. Ven ran a hand through his messy hair. 

_Having doubts now are we? Maybe you need a reminder of why we're here._

Ven paused. He didn't want or need the reminder. There was no joy in it. The reminders scared him. 

_You forgot the number one rule. No attachments. And yes. These reminders aren't meant to be pleasant by any means._

If this voice was him, why did it scare him so much? Why did it try and hurt him so badly? It was always giving "advice" on how to look, what to do, and why he should carry out certain tasks. The voice was loud and unrelenting. 

_Jung Hyunjin. I'm you. Trust me._

Ven shuddered at the usage of his full name. Why was it so hard to trust himself? Even if he was this voice telling the body not to eat. It was tormenting, the reminders. Ven wasn't even sure they were true. His parents were overjoyed at the thought of him becoming a Shining. They often told him of the things they used to do to his brother before he disappointed them. After his brother was gone, marred by the touch of sharpened steel, Ven became the trophy. He wasn't a person, he was merely an object bringing his family honor. 

_That's right. We're a trophy. Imagine if we were to turn back now. Imagine all the contempt you'd face. Why they'd try to correct you. You'd be in the room. The small one, unable to move. Remember how much we hate the room?_

Ven's shoulders tightened with fear. A quiet "No" flitted across his thoughts. He hated confined spaces. They were like the closet back home. The voice saw this and took the opportunity to bring up a memory Ven had buried impossibly deep. 

-

Ven didn't remember why he was being forced into the small cupboard. He must've done something, or his parents wouldn't torture him like this. All he knew is that he was forced into the cupboard. It was impossible for him to move. His muscles ached and his breathing was shallow. He barely fit, anyway. His eyes slid closed. Every vibration of a footstep, he wished to be freed from this cage. 

The oxygen was running out. No ventilation or anything. He started breathing in his own breath. The tenseness in his muscles relaxed. The sharp corners of the cupboard cut into his back and feet. He was starting to get dizzy. He was so afraid, so scared of death. His parents would be mad. Oh... He could feel his heartbeat. Then the voice appeared for the first time.

_Hello._

"Who are you?" he half expected the voice to leave. No one could read thoughts. 

_You._

"You can hear me?"

_I'm you. Would I ever do anything to hurt you?_

"That seems counter-intuitive if you're me."

_Precisely. Jung Hyunjin, do you trust me?_

"Sure?"

_I want you to inhale very deeply for me._

He did, breaking into a small coughing fit. The air was dangerously low.

"I don't think I can do it again. I just want to sleep."

_That's quite alright._

Ven had been let out of the cupboard two minutes later, his unconscious from spilling out into the hall. His hands were fists, his nails drawing blood from his palms. His parents had left him there. When he awoke, they hit him for bloodying the carpet. He hung his head. He wouldn't disappoint them again. 

-

There was a name for Ven's fear, but it was fear. He was flawed. He feared something. It was almost unacceptable for him to fear something, but here he was. A deaf Shining with voices in his head and intense claustrophobia. He was unnatural. Not because he was deaf or because he had fear, he was unnatural because of the voice. Ven reached for a piece of fruit on his nightstand. 

_You don't want that._

Ven did want it, very badly. He had barely eaten anything today, and his body was stressed beyond belief. 

_You're hesitating against my words? Have you forgotten I have your best interests at heart? You don't need food. You already ate too much. Check the list of things we've eaten today._

The list showed the only thing he'd been able to keep down was a small bowl of brown rice. Rice was high in sugar and carbs. A strawberry wouldn't hurt him that badly?

_If you eat that, I'm not letting you keep it down._

Ven shuddered and he replaced the fruit in the bowl. He'd rather be hungry than risk losing the rice he'd eaten.

_Good boy._

He nodded along. He was good. He was good. He wouldn't be forced into the cupboard again. Flopping onto his bed, Ven closed his eyes.

_Sweet dreams, Hyunjin._

-

Kyunghun peeled off the long gloves Dongho had admired earlier. He had no clue why Ven didn't was a Crystal, but he couldn't speak on that matter necessarily. Kyunghun didn't want one either. Another human to risk touching? No thanks. Skin to skin contact terrified him. It wasn't supposed to, but it did. Kyunghun had grown up in the lowest sector and was the only Shining not from the area. He didn't have the perfect childhood the other's had. He'd been hit, used, and bullied tremendously. 

There was a reason for all the bullying, of course. He was a very feminine looking boy. A great look for the Capital, but down there, not so much. There had been so many pokes and prods by the older boys at school. So many whispered taunts. He was always in discomfort, unable to feel okay around all these tormentors. Even the girls would join in on the teasing. 

Gradually, he began to fear their touch. The poking at his chest, the quiet slapping of his butt, and the "hugs" given to see if he was actually a guy. He didn't tell anyone because his home life wasn't much better. When Kyunghun had been summoned to the Capital to take his place as a Shining, he'd made a choice.

No crystal, no touching. With his newfound money, he'd invested in gloves, pants, and jackets. No matter the temperature, Kyughun made sure he had almost no skin showing. It was a fashion trend when he first joined the ranks, many media outlets calling him a prince. Whenever he dressed in white, girls swooned and guys rushed to purchase whatever he was wearing. It was amazing. However, he had to hide the discomfort if the occasion did arise.

Taeseok, the youngest of them all, had hugged him. He sat in quiet discomfort, trying not to shove the boy away. Was he, too, feeling him up? Did he not believe Kyunghun when he said he was a boy? In time, Kyung learned it was a sign of affection. He didn't like it, but it made them a little more bearable. At least there was no skin-to-skin contact. If that situation arose, he'd flee and become a wanted man. 

Kyunghun had made sure it wouldn't happen. His thoughts had drifted off track, there being no reason to think of his past. No, he was more curious about Dongho. He didn't look like the rumors had said. There was nothing marring his face, just a thin white line on his neck. He didn't look _capable_ of hurting anyone. Was it wrong to keep such a person down there? He didn't take responsibility for any accusations pertaining to the harm of others. All he seemed to do was help people, even if it hurt the richer citizens. 

Dongho looked so tired and innocent. What a shame there was an execution tomorrow. The boy would have to watch. Tomorrow, really in a couple of hours. Kyunghun liked to wake up early to pick out his outfit. He had settled on a muted red and was getting dressed. Minsung was supposed to officiate the ceremony today. Some clearly insane woman was being disposed of. She had been through camp unscathed and was now passing on.

-

Dongho watched, on a small screen that had risen from the floor, the event happening outside. They had caught an insane person, and for years were trying to correct her. She didn't listen or try to cooperate. She didn't look crazy, Rey, as the card pinned to her shirt read, looked completely at ease. 

With a dull tone of voice, she was listed as spreading falsities and making things up. Rey only smiled softly. 

"Try and drop a comment or a kudo, but no pressure, " she said cheerily. "And this is only a story, so don't worry. Carry on fellow readers! I wish you the best! And stream MCND's Crush and A.C.E. Favorite Boys remix. Support Got7, and be a good person!"

Now Dongho saw why she was crazy. The nonsense in her words was unfathomable. He blinked as Minsung held a small device. He pressed it, and Rey was sent away, where she would die alone. Dongho envied her lack of fear, but maybe she was so far gone, it didn't matter what happened to her. 

-

Minsung was livid. It wasn't a perfect sendoff. She was too cheery, to everything. It wasn't a warning or reminder to the people, no she made it look fun. She'd spouted her nonsense to the end. He yelled in frustration. Why couldn't everything be perfect? He had to make it perfect. Perfection was all he knew. Minsung threw the paper off his desk and tore up his belongings. He was so done with this stupid perfection expected of him. 

Minsung had always been perfect. It had destroyed his relationship with Minsoo, but he was perfect. Not a mistake during school, not a single hair out of place. It was stifling. It was absolutely terrifying to think something could go wrong. Minsung was so scared of what people would think of his now messy room. A flaw among his perfection. They were always watching, a constant reminder he had to be perfect. 

Frantically, Minsung started cleaning. He summoned Minsoo to help him and the brothers worked in silence. Minsoo didn't have to be perfect. Minsoo didn't have to worry about all of the troubles his brother went through. Minsoo didn't have OCD and an overwhelming feeling that everyone was watching his movements. All Minsung wanted was to be free. His paranoia and taking over, and in this world where everyone was supposed to be perfect he wasn't. That terrified him. He would be kicked out of the ranks. This mental condition was sickening.

Minsung sat in the middle of all his mess, unable to function. he couldn't work when the conditions were messy and right now he couldn't work simply because he was too scared to try and function any longer. There was nothing he could do but cry, and so he did. He had to hide this from the others. Minsung risked losing his spot at the top of this went on. Minsoo went to put a comforting arm around his brother but was shaken off immediately. He was strong enough to bear this on his own. There was no need for soft words and touches. His mask was broken beyond repair.

-

Minsoo had seen his fit of pure terror filled rage. There was no beauty in it at all. No perfection. Little did he know, everyone had some sort of issue. Everyone's masks were crumbling, bit by bit. 

Minsung was too obsessed with the idea of perfection.

Ven's voices were getting louder.

Kyunghun struggled to touch his _own_ hands together.

Youngjoon was struggling with feeling good enough, venting out his self-hate on Daehyun.

Taeseok was crying for reasons only he knew.

Dongho was silent, unable to move. 

In a perfect society, they were all hideous. How ironic, they were viewed as the most perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whooooo you made it! Did you like the little author cameos and such? Please please comment! I don't know if this is a storyline worth continuing and comments really light up my day <3  
> Your angst will be later-   
> maybe  
> :D  
> -  
> Bonus:
> 
> Author and character interactions  
> ~  
> Rey: Ven you're too perfect  
> +++ Suffering  
> Ven: this is fine  
> ~  
> Rey: looks at characters You, suffer more.  
> Ven: this is fine :')  
> Readers: This is also fine :')  
> ~  
> Ven: So can I at least show my suffering a little?  
> Rey: No <3  
> ~  
> Ven: So can I at least show my suffering a little?  
> Rey: yes- of course u can! You'll just have to give up any chance u had of being a Shining :D  
> Ven: D:  
> ~  
> *looks at Minsung innocently vibing*  
> Rey: You, you now have OCD  
> Minsung: D:  
> ~  
> Shinings: Sweet we're perfect?  
> Rey: Yes, but actually no  
> ~


	3. My Flaws Are My Own

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dongho goes brr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what is food
> 
> i havent eaten in a while
> 
> It's been nearly 24 hours

**My Flaws Are My Own. What I do with them is my choice.**

**\--------------------------------------------** **  
**

Dongho's knees hurt so much. He had lost track of time down in the Shining's dungeon. It was so monotonous, the long hours spent in the darkness was starting to take their toll. His mind was getting foggy. The only thing alerting him of passing time was his hair growth. It had started at his shoulders and was down to his knees now. Minsung visited sometimes, though Ven never came. Dongho wished Ven would come, he was so lonely. It had been a while since anyone had visited him though. Dongho wouldn't mind a visit. Visits meant light and sound. Isolation was scary. Though if Taeseok came, Dongho figured being alone was better.

The door creaked open. The light didn't turn on, but step by step, the figure came closer. Sugar scented the air. _Taeseok_. He had a sweets addiction, a lollypop always in between his lips. Just as the figure stopped, the light clicked on. Dongho winced, the light being foreign to his eyes. The candy was blue today. The youngest member of the Shinings smiled. He was lucid today. _Crap._ Lucid meant he was in control and control meant a really really bad day. Dongho looked hesitantly up. He was so terrified of the boy, even with the five-year age gap. 

He was like a fairy in his movements, but a demon in his actions. Taeseok bounced closer, his breath kissing Dongho's face. Though it was physically impossible, Dongho tried to shrink away from the younger. The action coaxed a giggle from Taeseok's lips. 

"Hello." He seemed to float above the ground. "I'm not having as much trouble remembering today. I'm so glad."

Dongho nodded.

"I know who you are today." Dongho looked up. _Did he really?_

 _"_ Taewoo. You thought I'd forget you."

Dongho looked down, sadly. He wasn't remembering correctly. Taeseok never remembered who he was. Dongho suspected worsening dementia. His mind had been steadily crumbling. Taewoo, from what Dongho had gathered, was Taeseok's older brother. Something about the twitchy way Taeseok moved around him made Dongho think Taewoo wasn't kind. Often long rants would ensue with movements to compliment them.

Today was no different.

"I guess you're wondering why you're in chains?" 

_Play along._

Dongho nodded.

"It's because I didn't have a rope. You used to tie me up with rope. Does it hurt?"

Dongho shook his head. If he told the truth he was a liar, if he lied he was a liar. Taeseok didn't differentiate. When the slap came, Dongho was ready. What he wasn't ready for was the stinging pain that seemed worse than before. Blood dripped down from the fresh-cut, a bloodied piece of glass in between Taeseok's fingers. 

"You won't. You won't be able to be perfect anymore. I'm the only perfect kid. Mom said so. She said you were too much. To rebellious. To much. I'm the good kid. I'm the favorite. I'm the better one. I did all this. Just look at what I did. I'm a Shining, I have a Crystal. I am the good kid here."

Dongho hung his head a little. He wouldn't be able to move away from the blows, but the false sense of security soothed him. He tensed when the blows came, the glass cutting at his face. There were no sounds that betrayed his pain, and that angered Taeseok. He started hitting harder, trying to elicit a sound. Silent tears streamed down Dongho's face from the sheer pain of it all. He didn't know what he had done to feel like this, after all. 

"Say something. Anything." Taeseok grabbed Dongho by the chin and shook him.

Dongho coughed, trying to force something out. He was sure he was supposed to be mad, but all he felt was a pity for this poor boy. He pitied all of them, Ven and Taeseok especially. He didn't know too much about Kyunghun, but he still figured they were all trapped in this decades-old traditional hierarchy. 

The door opened, interrupting Taeseok's furious ranting. Kyunghun stood there. The younger's eyes flickered with some recognition and he ran over. 

"Kyung!" he sounded like a different person, like a happy child. Dongho watched, slightly delirious from blood loss, but noticed the stiffness in Kyunghun's posture as Taeseok threw his arms around him. Small drops of blood wiped from the glass onto Kyugnhun's gloves. Taeseok looked incredibly uncomfortable with the sight of red on white and yanked the gloves off. It made him mad, all the red. 

"I'll be right back, Kyung!" he was cheerful and didn't notice the fear in the elder's face. Dongho watched with interest. The way the boy moved was less like a fairy, but more like a prince. His nickname was well deserved. However, without his gloves, he seemed to be small and scared. His skin, Dongho noticed, was incredibly creamy and pale. 

"Seok wait-" but it was too late, the young male was gone. 

Kyunghun looked down. He didn't mean for this to happen. All he wanted was to check up on the prisoner and Taeseok. Now his skin was exposed. He looked with interest down at his fingers. It had been a while since he'd not worn gloves, and the feeling fascinated him. Was this what being normal was? He moved his hands to pick up the scissors at his belt and walked toward Dongho.

Dongho looked incredibly scared, but at this point, he was so tired it didn't matter. He was surprised when shaking fingers took the looks of his too-long hair and started cutting. It was gentle, but the hands were shaking. 

_He's tied up. He's tied up._

Kyunghun kept repeating those words. He wouldn't touch. He couldn't touch. The silver scissors worked easily, Dongho's hair curling just around his chin. The heavy locks lay on the floor, and Kyunghun stepped back to admire his handiwork. Dongho felt relieved. It wasn't weighing down his neck anymore. Kyunghun was wondering how he had done it. Dongho lifted his head, his neck brushing Kyunghun's fingers. 

_Panic._

Kyunghun ran from the room, moving to wash his hands. He stayed in the bathroom, coating his hands in soap and running them underwater. He was on his twenty-fourth round when Ven stumbled in. Kyunghun looked up to hear retching voices. Five minutes later, Ven walked out of the cell to wash his hand. He wiped the small bit of drool from his mouth and swished liquid around. 

Kyunghun lifted an eyebrow. In the harsh lighting of the bathroom, Ven looked scrawny. His bones were accentuated and his skin slightly sallow. Had he eaten today? Kyunghun didn't remember. He just never paid attention. Maybe he should pay more attention to the other Shinings. Maybe if he desired to see, he would. But there was nothing he could do without the creeping feeling of fear. He was so exposed without his gloves. Moving to his room, he thumbed through and pulled on a fresh pair. Relief crashed over him.

-

Ven didn't realize Kyunghun was there when he moved to vomit. He had eaten the strawberry and it tasted so sweet. He was so happy before, but now he felt empty. Unconsciously he walked throughout the rooms and halls, his feet dragging himself to Dongho's room. The older male lifted his head, happiness sparking in the dull eyes. Ven missed his friend. Was it still okay to call Dongho a friend? Why would Dongho look happy to see him?

Dongho looked awful. Ven looked at the disheveled and tired body with a surprisingly nice hair-cut. Kyunghun must've done it; Ven noticed a pair of scissors when he was washing his hands. Against his better judgment, the voice was yelling again and Ven really couldn't care at this point, he unlocked Dongho's arms and legs, leaving nothing but the collar. Ven didn't know what he was expecting, but he wasn't prepared for Dongho to collapse. 

_Fool. Pathetic._

The voice was screaming louder and louder, but this time, Ven could barely hear it. He rushed to Dongho's side massaging out the tired limbs, Dongho shuddered as feeling coursed through his body for the first time in a while. He didn't have the strength to do anything but lie there, waiting to be hit or something. It was Ven though. Ven wouldn't hurt him. 

A weak arm tugged gently on the hem of Ven's shirt. He turned, only to have the arm thrown around him in an awkward half-hug. Dongho was crying. Real tears of emotion and sadness streamed down his face, begging Ven to just give him another chance. He was so sorry he wasn't enough, that he didn't match their standards. Part of Ven wanted to scream Dongho wasn't a criminal. But in the eyes of those above, he was. He had done things. What _had_ he done though?

In a daze, Ven left Dongho on the floor, stumbling around. Somehow he ended up in his room, in his bed. He didn't see Dongho reaching out for him, crying and feeling more alone than he had been in a very long while. Ven was so close. Ven was too far. Too frikin far. A centimeter felt like a mile, and the distance between them kept increasing. 

"Why Dongho?"

 _He terrorized the city._

"How?"

_Do you need to question me?_

"No, but-"

_No questions._

"I deserve some answers." 

_You deserve nothing. Without me, you would've died in the cupboard._

"You lie. I'm here, and I will be here."

_You're nothing without me._

"But I am!"

_You're not._

"Dongho saw me as a person."

_Maybe you should rot like him._

Ven let out a shout, throwing a plate against the wall. He was shaking from anger, fear, self-doubt, and confusion. Who was he? Why did he have to listen to this voice that kept talking and telling him all this information where he couldn't keep up? He wanted to eat, breathe, and live freely. If this was what being perfect was, he didn't want to deal with it at all. He didn't want to be Jung Hyunjin. He wanted to be Ven.

-

Youngjoon looked in the mirror. It had been pure luck he ended up in this room. It wasn't anything he did, he was never the most confident, the best looking, or the smartest, and yet here he was. He stood above all of them. Daehyun walked into the room, a smile placed on his face. Oh, how Youngjoon hated that smile. He wanted to punch it, get it away. Daehyun was everything he was supposed to be. He was perfect. He was so frikin perfect. Every time Youngjoon yelled or hit him, Daehyun soothed him. He had never gotten upset or threatened to hit anything.

Before Youngjoon could react, he watched his fist fly at the blond male. So much emotion had built up. He could care less about Dongho, care less about being perfect, and Daehyung just happened to be right there, in the way. Why were they always in the way? He cursed under his breath, scared from the sheer exhilaration he felt. Daehyun was crumpled on the floor, clutching at his jaw. There was blood, the staining crimson painting the floor as it dripped from Daehyun's mouth. 

A twisted glee filled Youngjoon. He was more perfect than Daehyun right now. There was a difference. He wasn't bleeding, but his Crystal was. Youngjoon was in a euphoric haze. He'd threatened to hit Daehyun before but hadn't ever gone through with it. He'd make himself feel better by denying the Crystal food and forcing him to stay near him. He never wanted to be left by anyone. Never. 

Daehyun excused himself to run to the bathroom. It wasn't nearly as nice as the one for the Shining's, looking more like a laundry room. Jaewon was in there scrubbing a pair of gloves but dropped them when he saw Daehyun's bleeding face and now purple skin. With a hiss, he helped the younger to sit down and pressed a cloth against his face. Daehyun let out a small whimper; he had never been good at handling pain. As Jaewon tended to Daehyun, Minsoo was trying to tidy Minsung's room. His palm was cut with a piece of something sharp, he couldn't tell what it was, but it hurt. Mopping up the small lines of life from the floor, he too moved to the bathroom.

He didn't expect the scene that greeted his eyes. A worried Jaewon crouched over a bleeding Daehyun. His own palm was neglected as he rushed to the youngest Crystal. Jaewon looked relieved to see Minsoo. His back was hurting thin scabs spiderwebbing all over it. Taeseok liked lashing out. 

"Dae. Dae. Did he actually hit you?" Minsoo asked, his voice hushed.

"Mhm... I didn't see it coming." 

"Minsoo, Youngjoon actually did it," Jaewon spoke softly. 

"All of them have been on edge since they caught Dongho," Daehyun mumbled.

"We need a place to hide for a little bit."

"On the topic of Dongho..." Jaewon trailed off.

"Is Dongho even safe?" a small voice crept into the conversation.

"They have him all chained up."

"Daehyun can't run if he's rabid."

"Jaewon, just carry him."

"Me?"

"You think I can with this height?"

"But my back."

Minsoo cursed. "How bad is it?"

"Pretty bad."

"Hold him bridal style."

"Fine."

The three boys padded out of the washroom toward Dongho's cell. They were wary, expecting a large angry man. What they didn't expect was a young boy, barely older than Minsoo curled up in the middle of a stone platform. The chains Ven had neglected to put back lay next to him. Dongho lifted his head a little. He was so lonely, isolated like this. The three other boys walked over hesitantly. 

"Hi. Can we crash here for a couple of hours?" Minsoo awkwardly asked. 

A nod.

"Are you mad at us?"

A quick shake of the head. Every part of him seemed to beg them to stay. 

"I'm Minsoo, that's Jaewon, and that's Daehyun. Are you Dongho?"

A nod.

"Can you speak?"

A shake.

Oh. _Oh._ No wonder the rumors were so dark. This boy, he was really like their ages, and around the Shining's ages, couldn't defend himself or set the truth right. Jaewon had stripped his shirt in an effort to make a pillow for Daehyun to lie on. Minsoo stroked Daehyun's hair, telling the boy to sleep. 

Dongho's eyes were fixed on the three of them. People were here. He wasn't being hit. This was perfect. Struggling slightly, he managed to pull himself into a sitting position, flexing his fingers and legs. Quietly he touched the shorn hair and the cuts on his face. He felt less than human in this position. He was drawn to the sight of Jaewon's back, wincing as he mentally traced the cuts. These weren't done on accident; the pattern cleanly etched into the skin. Dongho longed to communicate with them, find out about them and their roles as a Crystal. 

Minsoosat next to him, a quiet babble of conversation filling the large room. Jaewon sat nearby to inject words and questions. Dongho was happy. Minsoo figured they should fix Dongho's chains to how they were, and though Dongho dreaded the feeling of joints pulled back and aching knees, he was inclined to agree. 

Eventually, the three had to go, and Dongho looked a little forlorn. 

"We'll be back."

"Promise."

"Thank you!"

The chorus of hushed voices cheered goodbyes and for the first time, Dongho looked forward to something. 

-

Minsung checked the position of the flame and the charcoal. His door was closed and locked, his window sealed. His room was perfectly neat again. He was perfect. Shaking, he lit the flames underneath. Draping himself on the bed, he lay there, waiting for the sweet perfect end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :')
> 
> why is it spicy
> 
> im so sorry the chapter is late, I failed on my writing schedule


	4. Burning With a Smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The epic, not so epic finale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we did it peeps

**"I might burn to the ground, But see me burn with a smile"**

**\--------------------------------------------**

It was Minsoo who found Minsung's body. The corpse of his brother was a shocking sight, but not nearly as shocking as the note he found on the desk. The words inked onto the paper were dangerous, threatening to unravel the reality the Shinings worked so hard to maintain. Yet here was Minsung, the most perfect of them all, dead by his own hand. Minsoo was shocked. He never thought there was a possibility Minsung was unhappy in this life. Yet, every letter on the note outlined the clear _unhappiness_. Minsoo numbly opened the window. Sure, Minsoo hated his brother, but not enough to wish him dead. Now finding the corpse... It was enough to break Minsoo. He sobbed, tears rolling down his cheeks. 

His brother was dead. The head Shining was dead. The careful hold they held was crumbling beneath them. There were no perfect endings, no carefully crafted lies. Here was the representation they had failed. Minsung hadn't been perfect if he was driven to do this, there was a clear demonstration of imperfection. Brokenness. With shaking hands he reached toward the note on the desk. The writing was messy and hurriedly scribbled out, unlike the calm even script Minsoo normally saw.

-

_When you see this, I'm dead. There's nothing you can do. All the terrible rage pent up inside of me is gone. You can't control me. No more chips, cameras, anything. I am free. You can't deny me that, though I've denied hundreds of others. I blame everyone who forced me into this box, this bubble. Every person is despicable. The last thought I hold in my mind is the grossness of humanity. There is nothing I'd like more than to tear down this kingdom I've built. The boy in the dungeons started everything though. I blame him for causing my earth to tremor._

_At last, their controlling eyes are gone. As the last breath leaves my body, I have one dying wish. Make it all burn. I want the life I was forced to live to crumble beneath the feet of the remaining four, and the three crystals. Watch it all burn with the root of everything still down below._

_Minsoo. You're probably the only one reading this. Destroy it all. Please. Make it beautiful by leveling it to the ground. I don't care if you choose to die too. Just destroy this town. Watch it burn for me. Leave Dongho in the prison. The despicable boy deserves to stay with all the wrongs he's done._

_I do love you,_

_Minsung._

-

Tears dripped down Minsoo's face. Blood was thicker than water. He too would enjoy watching the city burn. Screw friendship. The family was more important. Family. First, he'd go into the dungeon and make sure Dongho was tightly secured. Then he'd make sure the other Shinings were locked in their rooms. He'd douse the place in gas, get Jaewon and Daehyun to safety and set it all ablaze. There would be the end to the cursed perfection and wretchedness this society was. Everyone here was fake. Except, the time he spent with Dongho didn't feel fake. It felt genuine, the mute boy trying to just help.

Minsoo hit his head. He wasn't going to back out. Minsung had asked him to cleanse the area. He could do that. Tears fell onto the paper. Dongho had caused this. He had driven Minsung to do all this. It was all Dongho's fault he no longer had a brother. Dongho's fault. It was all the boy's fault. Minsoo's chest tightened with resolve. He walked out of the room, the note now folded into his pocket. Fetching an extra chain set, he handed it to Taeseok, mumbling about how Dongho needed the extra restraints. 

Flammable liquid and oil were picked up from the kitchen and slowly he began pouring it all around. It would catch fire when needed. He mapped out the layout of the large castle; it was the best word to describe it. An escape here and there. The promise to visit Dongho knawed at him. Minsoo didn't like breaking promises. He'd visit Dongho once more. Then he'd gather the Shinings, tell them the news, send them to their rooms, and light the place on fire. On second thought, did he have to tell them? He would. Just to see their faces.

He strolled down to visit Dongho, now more metal than flesh showing. A tight but unnecessary gag covered the top of the older's face. Minsoo trailed his hand over the exposed cheekbones. Dongho couldn't even shake his head anymore. His dark eyes pleaded with Minsoo just to let him go. 

"I can't do that," Minsoo spoke softly. "I'm not even supposed to be here in the first place."

Dongho gave a flick of his eyes up and down. It was a makeshift nod.

"Minsung killed himself. Carbon monoxide poisoning." Minsoo showed Dongho the note.

He watched the boy's eyes widen in shock. 

"Yeah, he said to leave you here to burn."

'But you won't right?' Dongho's eyes were communicating. Minsoo was shocked he understood.

"I have too. After all, you were the cause of all this."

'Me?'

"Yes, you. If you had just gone to the camp like you were supposed to, none of this would've happened."

'He was already unstable. Everyone here is.'

"He was perfect. My brother was perfect." no slime came with the phrase "my brother" this time. Minsoo smiled. "He was perfect until you came. So was Ven. So was everyone. Because you're here Youngjoon hit Daehyun. I don't know who you are, and I don't care. Your existence pushed everyone over the edge. So I'm going to destroy it. Fire."

'Why? And why Ven?'

Minsoo scoffed. "He's holed up in his room more than normal."

'Because of me??'

"Yes, you. He cares about you. Maybe I should lock him in here while I watch the place burn."

'What have they done to you?'

"They? THEY? Dongho, you misunderstand. It was all you. Your existence. Your presence. You. Ruined. Everything."

'Me?'

"You."

Minsoo pulled out a canister of gas, pouring it over Dongho's head. The older male coughed, his eyes stinging in with the aggressive, slightly acidic liquid. There were tears mixed in with the gas as it streamed down Dongho's body. Minsoo looked down sadly. 

"I'm sure you had good intentions. But thanks to you, the lives of millions is going to end." 

Minsoo spun on his heel and left. Gas poured out behind him. His plan was set perfectly. There was nothing to stop him. Dongho was restrained. The other Shinings were in their rooms. All he had to do was grab a match and get Dae and Jaewon. It was perfect.

His plan was perfect.

Until...

It...

Wasn't...?

-

Problem number one.

Daehyun and Jaewon were nowhere Minsoo looked.

-

Problem number two. 

The flames caught with a stray kitchen spark.

-

Problem number three.

Minsoo was still inside the castle.

-

The orange heat licked everywhere, consuming tapestries. Minsoo ran around, pulling burning wreckage here and there. The smoke was incredibly thick and he was unable to breathe well. In the bathroom, he found an unconscious Daehyun and a semi-conscious Jaewon. The two boys were unable to move. 

_No._

Minsoo hoisted Jaewon to his feet and picked up Daehyun. Forcing them to move, the exit so far away. 

_He had planned. What had gone wrong?_

Daehyun coughed, Minsoo pulling his two brothers, basically, to safety. Jaewon fell, Minsoo pulling him towards the door. 

_10 feet_

Daehyun was getting heavy. Jaewon had almost stopped breathing. 

_7 feet_

Jaewon was struggling to even move. Daehyun had stopped breathing. Minsoo set down the corpse on his back. There was no use salvaging a dead body.

_5 feet_

"Just a little further." Minsoo coughed to the boy next to him. Jaewon opened his ash-covered lips, but no sound came out. Minsoo sat, so close, yet so impossibly far from freedom, crying like his heart would break. The light dimmed in Jaewon's eyes. 

_He had made a plan. It was supposed to work. Plans always worked._

He had no reason to go on if Daehyun and Jaewon were dead. Yet, he pulled himself closer to the exit. 

_2 feet_

"I'm sorry Minsung. I'm sorry Dongho. I'm sorry Jaewon. I'm sorry Daehyun." Minsoo coughed. Red. It was always that cursed red. Maybe he was wrong in trying to kill everyone. Maybe Dongho was right. Maybe Minsoo had been looking for a scapegoat. A tear trickled down his face, the note from Minsung burning in the fire. What a beautiful last sight to see. Minsoo's eyes went dull, his fingertips reaching toward the outside. 

There was so much regret in his small frame.

\---

Taeseok watched the flames. There was something in the depths of his memories. The fire was warm. It was comforting. He smiled, clapping like a little kid. There was nothing more beautiful than the fire. The young tormentor watched as the flames crept into his room. 

"Have you come to play?"

No response.

"I like playing."

The flames came closer.

"You have come to play!" 

Happy sounds echoed throughout the small room. 

"Would you like some candy?" Taeseok threw some unwrapped sweets into the flames. 

The fire grew a little bigger. 

"Very nice! Candy is good, isn't it?"

The fire surged closer, consuming crude crayon drawings on Taeseok's walls. All at once, the boy's face screwed up in tears. He had spent hours on those. Why were they gone? He swatted at the flames, yelping.

"You ate my pictures and then you bit me? You're not very nice."

The fire came closer. Taeseok cried. For the first time in several years, he remembered pain and fear. They were the last things he felt in his last breaths. 

His friend had betrayed him.

His friend called Fire. 

\---

No. No way.

Youngjoon was not having this. 

Instead of the flames consuming him for a long and painful death, he opened a bottle. 

White stared up at him.

So much white. 

It would ease his pain. 

In one fell swoop, Youngjoon swallowed as much white as he could. 

He closed his eyes.

_Thud_

When did he get here, on the floor? 

It was all numb.

It was kinda nice not being able to feel.

He closed his eyes, feeling nothing but warmth in his last moments.

\---

Kyunghun knew he was going to die. There was no reason he was going to live, after all. Some primal instinct reared its head and roared. He wanted to live. In a desperate attempt, Kyung threw open his window and jumped. There was no rhyme, no reason, just the knowledge of water beneath him. 

He hesitated before the jump. Maybe the fire would be kinder?

No. He jumped. 

_Should've looked down._

He was falling until he wasn't. Hitting the surface, Kyunghun's breath was knocked out of him. He was shocked by the cold, unable to move. He was sinking.

Oh. 

_Oh._

He was drowning. The water pressed him tight, the burn in his lungs. It just begged him to let go and relax. Give in to the water and its kindness. He could do it. He could do it. 

He couldn't do it.

Kyunghun gave into the water and in 3, maybe 4 minutes had left the land of the living. He looked toward the sky, the stars being the last thing he could see in this cruel world of forced perfection. 

\---

Dongho watched the flames lap at the oil around him. They rushed up to his body. It hurt, oh it hurt so badly. What hurt more was the pain in his head and heart. He had caused this. It was his fault. He was the cause of all the pain. 

If only he had stuck with the social rules. 

If only he hadn't tried so hard to fix everything. 

If only he had been better. 

The flames consumed the oil on his flesh. 

The chains were so hot. 

The scent of burning flesh filled the air. 

"I'm sorry I wasn't enough... I'm sorry I messed everything up. Maybe perfection is a social construct at this point, but my actions destroyed society..."

And through the gag, Dongho forced out a small phrase. It was more a grunt. But it was still comprehensible. 

"It... hurts..."

A small smile traced his lips, burned there by the eternal flames.

\---

Ven ran. He wasn't running away, no he was running toward Dongho. He was too late. The body of his first and only friend had already been consumed by flames.

So he turned. He was shedding the rings, the furs, any inkling of his formerly rich life, he left to be consumed by the flames. 

_And he made it out._

Ven had freed himself from the flames, his screaming voice quieted to a dull yelling. He couldn't hear anything through his grief. Dongho. The only person who treated him like a person was gone. 

He had run.

As Ven turned, he watched the fire spread to all the different sectors. The whole of the neon cities was ablaze, all the buildings crumbling. It was all falling down.

And then...

Ven collapsed, the smoke forcing any oxygen out. 

He hadn't gotten far enough. 

As he collapsed, the city around him fell in a plume of dust and smoke. There was no more life, no more anything at this point. 

It was all gone. The remnants of a perfect society had burned, brought about by the one thing they sought to destroy. 

Imperfection. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALT NOTE:
> 
> (Go read those fics if you haven't. These notes will make more sense then.)
> 
> Jun (Final Scream): Oh goody look at all these souls to collect.  
> Minsoo (Butterfly Kissed): Screw fate, screw death.  
> Minsoo/Marionette (Final Scream): Who the heck let you be alive, functioning, and well??  
> Minsoo (And It All Falls Down): I'm dead? Ah well, perfection sucked anyway.  
> Jun (Butterfly Kissed): Holup, I'm the Gate keeper to the Afterlife, and You're a reaper? We have so much in common.

**Author's Note:**

> i love when im so broken  
> but no one questions if im okay
> 
> i love when i ask for love  
> and they leave
> 
> i guess i got trust issues  
> but who doesn't
> 
> im not special


End file.
